There were so many things happened in 2012:
Back from San Fransisco,after be a substitute teacher in a couple of elementary schools,I decided to do what I really want to do. I no longer expected a very limited scope of life, a life that simply meets the mainstream social values.
I changed a job as a designer at Culture X Creativity Design company where I felt like a café often visited by modern intellectuals. And coffee, indeed, was one of the products of the company, so I had a large personal working area near the window and a computer dedicated to my own use while drinking free coffee every working day. What’s more valuable was that my boss never saw working-over-time as a must, instead, he believed that it hinders a designer from producing good design.
As the time went by, however, I started to ask myself, is this job where I really want to be? It seemed nice; and undoubtedly, a Visual Communication graduate was supposed to follow the path to be a designer. Maybe I shouldn’t ask myself too many questions? Just hold on and stay stable for a while before making any new decisions?
My boyfriend and I have parted away for almost two years. But I still remembered what he has told me: Be honest to myself, and distinguish what I love from what I like.
One day when I was on my way back from work, I thought about him, and this reminded me to do the “Distinguishment". I liked my designer job; however, I loved to assist my artist teacher Fujui Wang, because I enjoyed being around with everyone who’s around him. They worked hard in order to meet their ideals, and I especially admired the attitude and energy revealed in their working about art. I wondered, would it be possible for me to be a person like that if I do what my passion really lies in?
A new idea came up to my mind with anxiety, nervousness and excitement about the unknown outcome; I then had a long conversation with my boss in one afternoon. My boss said to me, “It is easy for anyone to purely think about challenging the status quo, but there are always much less people to truly act it out. Go for it, you should try it out. You can come back here to resume your job as our designer if you fail. The seat will be reserved and always open for you." And so I did. I went to New Zealand for 15 days with Fujui in a three-city tournament. During the whole journey, I experienced the cold weather, exhaustion, tension, pressure and uncertainty, however, I was feeling satisfied and happy.
I can not expect my family to understand my new dicision that seems so crazy and unpromising now. However, life is short, I really don’t want to regret my own failure of not following my heart when I am old. I want to challenge what people said I can’t accomplish, I want to prove those are actually the dreams they can not fulfill or dare not to try. 2013 Lu Yi